Dear Humans,

As I’ve stood in the shower reading shampoo bottles, I’ve long thought they claimed to do more than they really did. Revitalizing? Purifying? Naturalizing? These are made up words.

And then I read an article about soap operas and soap marketing. Did you know we call them soap operas because they were originally used as soap advertisements? Commercial soap became a hot seller early in the 20th century at the same time that mass-marketing through radio and TV became possible. And a lot of those advertisements tried to convince us that we were dirty and a little bit ugly and only soap could make us clean and beautiful.

My favorite cliche is “If something’s too good to be true, it probably is.” If someone promises you something will revitalize or purify or beautify, if someone tells you that something is a miracle cure that will fix your life, you should give it a second, and then a third, look. And maybe keep your money in your pocket.

Sincerely,

Mr. Heimbuck