Dear Humans,

One time I was riding in a car with someone, and they let slip that they’d been in six car accidents, but “none of them were [their] fault.” At the next stop sign I went ahead and got out of the car and walked to my destination.

Sure, bad things can happen. But a lot of living (and most of driving) is taking the responsibility to avoid “accidents.”

So if you come in from recess after “accidentally” hurting someone, I’m not going to be very sympathetic. I’ll probably ask you what exactly you were doing that led to the “accident.”

Sincerely,

Mr. Heimbuck